Why People Don’t Decide

Many people would rather abide by the familiarity of what is happening now than take on the risk of an uncertain future with different results. Fear of the unknown is an overriding emotion for those who live by these rules. They believe avoidance of the new is a way to limit negative possibilities in their life.

This is a ruse, of course, because nothing ever remains the same for long and things tend to continue on their trajectory if there isn’t anything to change their course. So choosing to keep things the same is really choosing to have things dissipate energy over time. This leaves very little chance they will change in any preferred way.

In their decisions, people are usually going toward or running away from something.

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It is very important to discern whether you are “going toward” or “running away” from something in your decisions. This is your first clue into whether your results will be proactive and causative (going toward) or reactive and at the effect of (running away from). Additionally, there is a qualitative difference between moving away from one thing toward another (for example, leaving an abusive relationship to created peace in your life) and running away (not being willing to handle the responsibilities of having a relationship).

Why People Don’t Decide

Sometimes people don’t choose a path because they’ve encountered an obstacle they’ve failed to overcome. Rather than exploring additional ways to approach this obstacle (including getting new advice, seeking assistance from others, trying different alternatives, wearing down resistance, changing behavior), they stop in their tracks. This is self-defeating and demoralizing. It is tantamount to giving up on yourself, with predictably unsatisfying results.

Many of us know someone who has given up on himself. Their frustration can be manifest in many different ways: they can be depressed, jealous, angry, withdrawn, passive, hostile, or violent. They are often unhappy and disengaged from their own feelings. They have given up on the one person who can actually create a live experience filled with happiness: themselves.

Sometimes people don’t decide because they’ve bought into someone else’s definition of a constraint. We’ve called these people Stoppers. Curiously, many Stoppers express the desire to control your life experience precisely because they will not do so for themselves. They fail to make decisions that make them happy, so they want to replicate this result with you. This can be confusing and unpleasant and lead us to a mindset where we don’t move forward with our decision. We consequently make no decisions at all. Instead of creating the life we want, we react to the comments from those who are not creating their happiness. It’s no wonder listening to Stoppers usually turns out poorly for us.

You are the master of your own happiness. Making choices that take you on that path is the key to creating the experience and result you desire. Certainly anyone who is happy themselves will tell you that. It is only those who are frustrated and angry, who don’t know for themselves, who insist on holding you back from what your best choice may be.

Who are you going to listen to? Again, it’s your choice.

Why People Don’t Decide

Yours in Success,

Dean Howell

Husband – Father – Entrepreneur – Business & Personal Development – Leadership – Connecting GeoSpatial Professionals – Fire Fighter – Pilot

P.S. “Seven Steps to Success” – success strategies that you can implement today, email me at dean@imagine-dream-believe.com for your free copy

Dean Howell

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